kidlove

Best Children's Book- Claude and Medea: The Hellburn Dogs

2011-01-09T00:09:46Z

With winter in full gear, and the holidays behind us, I am finding more time to do things I enjoy like snuggling up in bed and reading good books. Lately I have discovered that I enjoy my kids' books almost as much as my own as I read out-loud to them books like Harry Potter, The Lightning Thief and The Immortal Secrets of Nicholas Flamel.

My latest favorite though is Zoe Weil's book, Claude and Medea: The Hellburn Dogs as it combines a great story with social responsibility and other life lessons. Zoe Weil, is a genius and has boiled down her wisdom into this delightful read for children to enjoy and learn from. 'Claude and Medea' is great tool for parents in raising thoughtful, compassionate and socially responsible children! If you have kids I recommend you get it today! You can buy it here at Amazon.com.

It's a New School Year: Tips for Studying Smarter, Not Harder

2010-09-09T04:36:23Z

By Linda Shiue

The new school year has started. Do you know how your children are studying?

Conventional wisdom for effective studying techniques includes a clear desktop in a quiet space, a homework schedule, and a routine.

Turns out, these tried and true techniques from folk wisdom are in many cases the exact opposite of what science would recommend.

Research findings summarized in a recent New York Times article can help everyone from a third grader learning multiplication tables to a retiree learning to speak Dutch.

Here are a few techniques for smarter studying that have science to back them up:

1) Study in varied settings-- A change of background can lead your brain to form more complex associations and in turn, stronger memories.

2) Cross-train your brain-- instead of memorizing the same set of ideas over and over, study related but different material in a study session. By allowing the brain to compare and contrast rather than simply focusing on one concept, the associations formed appear to be stronger. This is similar to physical benefits of the cross-training athletes do.

3) Study often and repeat; don't cram. Cramming may help with immediate recall, but does a poor job with later retention.

4) Don't be afraid of a challenge. Difficult subjects or tests will actually help your brain to learn. This is a concept called "desirable difficulty," which essentially means that the harder it is to remember something, the harder it is to later forget.

Photo credit: Wellcome Images-- University Children's Hospital, Vienna: children learning ge

A Summer Reading List for Raising a Globally Aware Reader

2010-06-10T05:26:25Z

By Linda Shiue

Are your kids feeling bored? Are you tired of their obsession with Hannah Montana and Disney Princesses? Here's a list of books that will open their minds and imaginations to the rest of the world. Give them a global perspective, and a better understanding of the many cultures right in our backyard, including your own. You'll enjoy the world tour, too.

How Do People Live Around the World?

1) Material World

By Peter Menzel and Charles C. Mann (Sierra Club Books, 1995)

All ages.

This beautiful book of photographs and cultural anthropology is a fascinating exploration of how typical families live around the world. In 1994, the UN-sponsored International Year of the Family, photojournalist Peter Menzel conceived of this project to capture the lives of typical families in 30 countries around the world. In each vignette, he and his collaborators photographed families together with literally all of their wordly possessions, posing in front of their homes. The photographers spent a week living with a "statistically average" family in each country and interviewed them about their lives, their work, and their attitudes towards their possessions. The stark visual contrast between the portrait of the average family in Texas with their multiple televisions versus the family living in a dirt house in Mali is enlightening and thought provoking. Sometimes a picture truly can say a thousand words. The book also includes statistics on numbers of toilets, televisions, and GDP to further illuminate the disparities.

This is not a children's book per se, but I would recommend it for all ages. Capturing kids' minds while they are wide open is the perfect time for them to literally see how the rest of the world lives. This book is sure to engage a reader of any age, and lead to discussions about wealth and materialism. It might even make the average American child realize just how lucky he is.

2) Mama & Papa Have a Store

By Amelia Lau Carling (Dial Books, 1998)

Ages 4-8.

A story book with beautiful, colorful illustrations, Mama and Papa Have a Store depicts the mundane daily life of a typical preschooler. She happens to be of Chinese descent growing up in Guatemala with her family, but her story will be familiar to any young child: going to school, eating with her family, playing, and observing her parents work in her family's general store. This is a very special cross-cultural story, involving Chinese, Guatemalan, and Mayan traditions: "They call [Mama] doña Graciela. But in Chinese her name means Lady Who Lives in the Moon. [Papa] is don Rodolfo in Spanish, and in Chinese his name means Fragrant Pond."

What Do People Eat Around the World?

1) What the World Eats

By Faith D'Aluisio and Peter Menzel (Tricycle, 2008)

All ages.

This is another beautiful and intriguing volume by the author who wroteMaterial World, in conjunction with his wife. In a follow up to his first book capturing how the average family lives around the world, this book looks at and visually describes what the average family eats around the world. Using the same format as in Material World, the authors of this book depict a week's groceries for typical families around the world. The authors spent time with 25 families in 21 different countries to provide this comparative global portrait. Cost and calories are included, but it takes only a glance at the photos to see the shocking differences between the pizza-eating and soda-drinking American families (six gallons a week!) and the families with vegetable-based diets in many other countries. Some of the interesting statistics provided for comparison include number of McDonald's, prevalence of obesity, and diabetes prevalence. In addition to being a launching pad for kids to consider how much or little families live on in other countries, this book is a great pictorial representation of why obesity and diabetes are epidemic in some countries, and not in others (yet).

2) Moonbeams, Dumplings & Dragon Boats

By Nina Simonds, Leslie Swartz and The Children's Museum, Boston. Illus. by Meilo So. (Harcourt, 2002)

Ages 9-12.

Chinese food and culture expert Nina Simonds created this book for children to understand five major Chinese festivals, highlighted through tales, recipes and activities. She offers festival lore and folktales that will be unfamiliar to non-Chinese readers. She tempts with mouth-watering yet simple recipes for dumplings and mooncakes. Also included are instructions for engaging activities to do with kids, such as building a kite at Qing Ming or a miniature dragon boat for the Dragon Boat Festival.

3) Too Many Tamales

By Gary Soto (Putnam, 1993)

Ages 4-8.

This is the story of Maria, a little girl who is excited to help out with her family's Christmas tradition of making tamales. She is even more excited by the idea of trying on her mother's diamond ring, which her mother takes off to knead the masa. Maria surreptitiously tries on the ring, and then forgets about it. Any kid who has ever done something in secret will relate to the terror Maria feels later when she can't remember what happened to the ring, and will share her relief when it is found, and she is forgiven. Along the way, you'll enjoy illustrations so warm and vivid with the colors of Christmas, you can almost taste the tamales.

Why Does Our Garden Look Different from Everyone Else's?

1) The Ugly Vegetables

By Grace Lin (Charlesbridge Publishing, 2009)

Ages 4-8.

The young girl who narrates this story is upset that her Chinese immigrant family grows vegetables instead of pretty flowers in their yard, like everyone else. She thinks the vegetables are ugly: "The wind always smelled sweet, and butterflies and bees flew everywhere. Everyone's garden was beautiful, except for ours."

When the veggies are ready for harvesting and go into a soup whose aroma entices the entire neighborhood, she has a new perspective on those "ugly vegtables," and a new appreciation for her family and culture. Written and adorned with lovely illustrations by the author, this is one of my favorite books to introduce acceptance of culutral differences. I also learned the names of some Chinese greens I previously didn't know. A recipe for Ugly Vegetables soup is included.

Does the Tooth Fairy Travel the World?

1 )Throw Your Tooth on the Roof: Tooth Traditions from Around the World

By Selby Beeler and G. Brian Karas (Sandpiper, 2001)

Ages 4-8.

Do you know a six or seven year old with a gap-toothed smile? If they still believe in the Tooth Fairy, they might assume that she, or her representatives, visit children all around the world. Not so! In many culutres, it's a rodent, not a pretty and ethereal fairy, who manages children's lost teeth. This is a fun book which describes tooth traditions from around the world. Fun for kids, and informative for the rest of us.

___________________________________________________

Intrigued? Here are two great resources for more multicultural books for children:

1) Children's Book Press publishes first-voice* authored multicultural books for children.

2) The San Francisco Public Library curates excellent lists of heritage books for children.

*written by authors from the culture

When Kids Start Needing Deodorant

2010-05-17T19:36:37Z

I sniffed both my armpits first before coming to the conclusion that it was my ten year old son that was the one with the awful body odor. Oy vey, my boy was starting the bumpy journey to becoming a man. After a few days of not being able to breathe in his presence, I went to the store and bought the most gentle and non toxic looking of the deodorants. I made a big deal about giving it to him- a sort of right of passage speech and then hoped for a fresh smelling son again. Well much to my dismay, the all natural eco deodorant worked as poorly on him as it did on me.

I was going to have to go and buy him a stronger kind. Meanwhile, before I got to the drugstore, his fifth grade class had 'the talk' at school as a part of the sex education effort they provide. They sent him home with a travel size sample of Old Spice Deodorant, which to me smells worse than body odor and is much more toxic to boot. According to the EWG, it is responsible for reproductive damage and is not good for adults much less children. Of course I alerted the school and in the meantime found the unscented Arm and Hammer deodorant that I am going to try as it is without parabens, fragrance and aluminum but still supposed to be effective.

I am sure that soon I will be looking at nontoxic shaving cremes for my son but in the meantime I want to make sure he is not poisoning himself unknowingly with a daily deodorant!

Yes, Kids Can Have Strokes Too

2010-04-28T21:03:32Z

By Linda Shiue

Delia was a happy, healthy and playful toddler. She did not have any past medical history or chronic illnesses that required monitoring. On a day like any other, she was playing when she slipped on the front steps and fell, hitting her head. Her parents brought her immediately to see her pediatrician, who did a physical exam and reassured them that Delia was fine. Later, Delia's parents noticed that she their daughter was "just a little off." She was drooling a little more than usual, and was clingy. She wanted to be held and carried, rather than walk. These were all behaviors which were not completely unusual, given that she had fallen recently. Understandably worried, despite the reassurance they had received from their pediatrician, Delia's parents took her to see a pediatric neurologist for a second opinion. He also reassured them, and recommended that they bring her to the emergency room if anything worsened. The parents, still convinced that something was wrong, did so, and were shocked to be told that their daughter, their previously healthy two-year-old, had had a stroke.

This is where Heather Fullerton, MD of the University of California, San Francisco, met Delia. Dr. Fullerton, who was a resident at the time, had not heard much about childhood strokes before, and found out that neither have many physicians, including some pediatric neurologists. In Delia's case, the stroke was a complication of the head injury she had the previous day- the carotid arteries in her neck were traumatized by the fall and as a result, blood flow to the brain was interrupted, leading to the stroke.

Indeed, childhood strokes are rare. Even at UCSF, a major referral center in Northern California and where Dr. Fullerton practices, they see about 6 cases per month. There are between 5,000-10,000 cases of childhood stroke per year in the US as a whole. The statistics show that 1 in 4,000 babies will have a stroke, and 1 in 8,300 children will have a stroke.

Fortunately, Delia survived, and after rehabilitation, was able to go back to her normal life.

Her case underscores the importance of identifying a possible stroke early. In addition to maximizing the chances of survival, early treatment maximizes the chances for successful rehabilitation. Without adequate and early rehabilitation, childhood stroke causes multiple disabilities, including paralysis, seizures, speech disorders, behavioral issues, and learning disabilities.

What happened to Delia also highlights the lack of awareness among most parents and even many professionals that children can have strokes. Inspired by Delia and other childhood stroke patients, Dr. Fullerton and colleagues have since created a dedicated pediatric stroke center at UCSF to focus on the research and clinical care of patients like Delia.

What Are the Warning Signs of Strokes in Children?

These are not too different from stroke symptoms in adults. They include

-Not moving one side of the body symmetrically, or weakness on one side

-Having difficulty walking or talking

-Sudden severe headache

-Vomiting, especially together with difficulty walking or sudden severe headache

Image Credit: Bill McConkey, Wellcome Images

_____________________________________________________________________________

May 2010 is Childhood Stroke Awareness Month

For more information:

http://www.KidsHaveStrokes.org/

http://www.childhoodstrokeawareness.org/

_____________________________________________________________________________

Should I Throw Away Their Candy?

2010-04-05T02:58:24Z

I mean seriously, how much candy does one kid need on Easter, Halloween, Christmas, Valentines Day etc!!?!!? On a normal day we might let them have one piece maybe or a couple if we were being indulgent so why then do we fill baskets, buckets, stockings and boxes full of candy when we don't want our kids eating it? I am tired of holidays that involve too much candy because as a parent I am then torn, do I throw away the excess, hide it, or just let them eat their fill in the coming week. And I actually stuffed their eggs with organic chocolates and gummies with all natural dyes etc. Most people fill them with the hard core stuff that is truly not good for you. I know kids love candy, the more the better, but as responsible adults how can we continue to celebrate in this fashion? I think I am more cranked up than normal about this stuff as I am just finishing a three week detox (the Clean program). So even at the Easter brunch this morning I was disgusted at the bacon, sausage, belgium waffles, bagels with cream cheese and the overall lack of nutritious food.

My kids are getting older and I have been through this before. I usually get over this excess candy issue by hiding it up high and giving them one or two pieces a day until they forget about it and then dump the rest. I tried this year to buy less and I actually filled some of their eggs with almonds which just about put my middle son in tears. He is the same son that went to bed tonight with a horrible headache from eating too much sweets. Well maybe this will be a lesson to him, in the same way we all have had to learn the lesson of self regulation. So maybe that is what these sugar holidays are meant to be...lessons in will power. Well, if that is the case, I failed. I too have a belly ache tonight. And next year won't be any different.

P.S. Since I posted this, a few people have written to me with suggestions of what to put in the eggs instead of candy. I like the idea of adding a puzzle piece in each egg and then the kid has to put the pieces together in the end (you can even make your own puzzle w/ a secret message!). But the best one was one I already do, and that is putting messages in the eggs. I write about what kind of messages in detail and how it is my kids' best part of Easter in the book, Bag Green Guilt. If you haven't already read it, buy one today! BTW it is now available on the Kindle!

Eco Easter Bunny

2010-03-29T01:00:25Z

Are you an Eco Easter Bunny? If so you will need to get hopping and order these great products today to fill the kids' baskets on Sunday:

Chocolate by CocoZen (see photo above).

Organic Gummy Bears

Organic Easter Cookies (photo below)

Organic Cotton Rabbit by Skoon:

And don't forget the pup! Here is an organic doggie treat Easter arrangement!

Teaching Compassion to Kindergartners

2010-03-23T16:12:45Z

By Linda Shiue

When I was in my first year of medical school, we were enrolled in a weekly seminar and practicum called "Doctoring." We began by learning how to interview patients. After our individual interviews, we would meet in small groups to discuss how the interviews had gone, and what emotions had come up for the patient, and for the student. Some of us had "life experience," or at least had held a job. But some, and it was very easy to identify which ones, had done nothing but study (very hard, and very long hours) their entire lives. They seemed younger than their years and immature.

One of this group was in agony each week, because she didn't understand what empathy was. She learned the definition, of course: "the capacity to understand, be aware, be sensitive to, and vicariously experience the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner" (Webster's Dictionary). She listened to others in the group talk about the empathy they felt for their patient, and discuss how hard it must have been for that patient to have their illness. "I don't feel anything for the patient," she said, which sounds horrible, but at least she was acknowledging and asking for help with this unfortunate and puzzling issue. She understood the importance of having empathy.

Can empathy be taught? Certainly, some people seem more endowed with empathy than others, born with large amounts of compassion. Animals can even have empathy. Pre-verbal infants can also demonstrate empathy: what I like to refer to as "contagious crying" is one example. I also remember when my daughter, maybe 9 months old, upon seeing my on the brink of tears when I was very ill, crawled onto my lap, put her arms around me, and kissed me, to comfort me. I was stunned by this display of empathy in such a young child.

Clearly, empathy is an example of a trait which is part nature, and part nurture. Jane Brody, of The New York Times, discussed this topic recently ("Empathy's Natural, But Nurturing It Helps," February 15, 2010). The studies she examined and experts she interviewed noted that besides having healthy self-esteem and secure attachments to their caregivers, teaching children to understand and identify what their emotions are and also what others are feeling are a few steps to teaching empathy. For example, telling a child who is crying because he didn't get his way, "You are upset because you feel frustrated that you didn't get a chance to play with that toy."

Explaining is one thing, but I think empathy may be best taught by example. Modeling good behavior and compassion towards others is an excellent way to teach or increase levels of empathy and compassion in children. In her article Jane Brody described the type of modeling that can be done at home, and at school:

"Parents who are sympathetic to the feelings of others and rise to a need for help, especially when it is not in their own best interest, can teach children how to identify feelings, think beyond themselves and respond empathetically to others... In school, teachers who inspire empathy are those who recognize and address the feelings behind a child's behavior. The most effective teachers are warm and affectionate -- and when trying to correct bad behavior they remain calm, not punitive."

I thought about this recently when Marcie Wollesen, my daughter's kindergarten teacher at a public school in San Francisco, brought her class of five and six year olds on two field trips to facilities serving the homeless. The concept of this type of field trip might catch you off guard; not the usual field trips the kids have to the beach, the Symphony, and museums. While community service has been made part of the curriculum in many school districts, it is usually not introduced until middle school or later.

The first of this two-part field trip series was to a local soup kitchen, and the second to a family shelter. Marcie, who has also taught third grade, has been leading these field trips on and off for several years. She started by holding sock drives at school: "Once the third graders wrote letters asking companies for socks and only one of them delivered: Gold Toe Socks. We asked them again this year and got two huge boxes full of socks for children, women, and men." In the past, she would collect the socks and one of the parents would deliver them to a shelter where she volunteered, but this year she wanted to do it in person, and bring the kids along.

I asked Marcie what she explains to a group of five and six year olds about homelessness: "I just talked to them about how they'd feel about being homeless and never having any brand new socks to wear. I tried to get them to imagine what it would be like to not have a warm bed, food, and someone to tuck them into their bed at night. It's important to me to instill a sense of service and caring for others into elementary school children while their hearts are still wide open."

Marcie's goal, of teaching empathy, has shown some early results. The kids responded eagerly to the sock drive and to another request for donations for Haiti. "Yesterday I was talking about growing up poor and always getting hand me down clothes," she said, " and kids raised their hands and said that their parents were poor, too, and didn't have any toys as children."

I was one of the parent chaperones on the second fieldtrip, to a family shelter. Before touring the facility, some of the children proudly gave their donations of clothing and toys to the staff. As we toured the various rooms in the shelter-- the dining area, the play room, the after-school room, and the rooftop playground, the social worker who was our tour guide told the children that, just like in their own homes, this was where the children ate, played, studied. Because the field trip was during normal school hours, there were no residents present during our tour. The children looked very eager to play in a playroom and on a play structure that were new to them. I was not sure how much they got from the trip (at least not from the interview I held with the three kids who rode in my car on the way back.)

Another class parent, Angela Young, who coordinated the field trips, had this to say about what she hoped the kids would gain from these experiences: "It is my hope that the kids gain a perspective that there are families who don't have a home or bed to sleep in everyday, and that there are places where people who are sad and lonely can come and get some food, take a shower and others will care for them. I hope that my daughter knows that she can make another little girl happy by simply sharing one of her dolls or books."

Early results seem positive: one parent told Marcie that her daughter thanked her for giving her a home and a bed. And themes of compassion and homelessness have even made their way into some of the stories the children have dictated: one student made a story in which she gives a pillow to a homeless old woman.

This is a good start. While people may be born with varying degrees of empathy, it is promising that this value can be nurtured through instruction and example.

Have any of your kids' teachers brought their classes on field trips to homeless shelters or other programs for the needy? What are some of the ways in which you think adults can teach empathy to children?

Dave Eggers' 826 Valencia: Hatching Young Writers

2010-03-12T04:14:36Z

By Linda Shiue

"What about Lady Gaga?" one of the boys offered, when asked for suggestions for the protagonist of the story the class was making.

"She would be a great character," said the funny and talented teacher, Josh, "But she already exists in real life. We are going to be original and creative today."

And so began the two hour writing workshop at 826 Valencia, the children's writing and tutoring center co-founded by Dave Eggers in 2002. While Eggers, a former Salon.com editor known for A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius and McSweeney's, is no longer involved in the daily operations of this fantastic and inspiring place, his spirit and creativity linger on.

The need for a place dedicated to fostering children's creativity and improving writing skills to help them succeed in all subjects at school is felt profoundly these days. There are drastic cuts to funding for public education and class sizes are rapidly expanding. In an effort to improve the quality of public education, our schools' curricula have been adapting to standards based education, as legislated by No Child Left Behind. While standardization is aimed at improving the quality of all the public schools nationally to a minimum standard, an irrefutably good intent, a potential downside is that there may not be much room for creativity. But if we can make writing fun, we may be able to breed a new generation of writers.

826 Valencia is definitely fun. You enter the space through the Pirate Supply Store, the best place for San Francisco's pirate community to outfit itself, with striped shirts and tights, eye patches, rope, and just about everything else a pirate needs. The store's retail sales, along with donations, help support the free programs offered by 826 Valencia. The main space feels like a pirate's rec room, if there were such a thing. Behind red velvet curtains and up a tall wooden ladder are the behind the scene workers who, in the amazingly brief turn around time of two hours, turn the ideas of twenty or so school children into a book, printed, illustrated (live), and bound with individual endings and About the Author pages for each child.

I helped chaperone my daughter's second grade class to one of the workshops at 826 Valencia this week, and it was the most fun I have had on a fieldtrip, ever. I couldn't stop laughing.

Before the trip, I did not know how engaged the kids would be in the workshop. What happens to children's imaginations in the age of technology, where television, DVDs and Nintendo DS supply so many images? I worried that kids might no longer be able to dream up their own stories, fantasies, or worlds.

I needn't have worried. In a democratic, supportive and collaborative way, the facilitator reviewed the structure of a story (beginning, middle, end, with a protagonist and his side kick, and a villain) before drawing out the kids' ideas. He introduced the kids to the word "nemesis."

Votes were taken with a show of hands for each character and the story line, and with great speed and accuracy, but also with creativity, two other teachers, both named Laura, turned the kids' ideas into a coherent story. One of the Lauras, a great illustrator, interpreted the kids' ideas and descriptions into drawings (something like criminal suspect sketching, I guess) to illustrate the story.

The story was titled, "Ch'chair and the Escape from the Squeesquack Desert." The nemesis, it was decided, was the leader of the Ice People, who prevented Peanut Man and his sidekick, Porange (a pomegranate with a orange peel skirt) from moving beyond the boundaries of Squeesquack,the desert in which they lived. The leader's name was Ch'chair, but he was often called Keith. (These kids and their free imaginations!) Ch'chair and his Ice People wanted to have all of the peanuts from the peanut trees that encircled the desert.

After the story was 75% complete, the kids split up into tables to work on their individual endings to the story. There was a great variety in how each child thought the story should play out:

"They got rid of the Ice People by melting them."

"They did their plan, and it worked. Porange went on her side and rolled away, plus Peanut Man did that too. The Ice People were sad and Squeesquack never had a problem again."

During the creation of the story, the workshop was punctuated by the disembodied voice of Mrs. Blue, the Editor. Her raucous voice periodically interrupted the workshop with incantations to hurry up, to meet the deadline. The legend is that Mrs. Blue rejects nearly everything submitted to her. The kids huddled together cross legged at the bottom of the stairs, in nervous anticipation of whether or not Mrs. Blue would accept their story endings for publication. Thankfully, there was a 100% acceptance rate. Much relief in that crowd.

The workshop we attended was staffed by students from Slippery Rock college in Western Pennsylvania, who were there as volunteers on their Spring break. The place is staffed largely by volunteers, many of whom are professional writers. There is a drop-in afterschool program mainly for tutoring, which is how 826 Valencia started out. There is also a multitude of writing workshops, including some for adults. The workshops are project-based and run the gamut from cartooning, college entrance essay writing, journalism, SAT prep, and starting a 'zine. Here is a link to a video clip which offers a glimpse into some of the 826 Valencia programs.

If I were a kid, I would be [Lady] Gaga over this place. 826 Valencia has expanded nationally, with chapters in NYC, Los Angeles, Michigan, Seattle, Chicago and Boston, so you may find another location in your neck of the woods. Programs like this will hopefully keep creativity alive, even in the face of standards based teaching. If my daughter's class was any indication, these programs will produce a new crop of writers who will pen stories about Ice People in the Desert, and expand their imaginations beyond their television horizons of Sponge Bob and Harry Potter.

What types of programs do your communities have to promote a love of learning and creativity in school children?

Move Over Hanna Andersson, Hessnatur Is Here

2010-02-20T06:07:08Z

If I can't find my kid's clothes at the local thrift store, I try to buy from socially responsible companies like the Swedish based Hanna Andersson. There are a lot of other organic kid's clothing stores, but Hanna Andersson's prices are good as is the quality. Well tonight I came across a Hanna alternative that I love. Hessnatur is a German based company that is doing all the right things by the environment and is making eco-friendly, adorable, well-priced clothing for kids and adults alike. Read this on how the dress in the photo above is made:

Easy and comfy maritime style dress with soft front pleats. This organic cotton is the product of a groundbreaking fair trade project in Burkina Faso, where a special premium is paid to support the development of a whole community - and to encourage increased organic cultivation.

I highly recommend checking out their entire site as it is a great place to shop for the whole family!

Genetic Screening or Eugenics?

2010-01-30T17:31:03Z

A start-up company in Silicon Valley has released a test which will allow prospective parents to find out if they are carriers for genetic diseases. The company, Counsyl, tests saliva samples submitted by customers for the genetic mutations associated with 100 rare genetic diseases, including Pompe's disease, which is featured in the film, "Extraordinary Measures."

Besides being easy to do (DIY sampling at home), the test, called the Universal Genetic Test, is also relatively inexpensive- $349 for an individual, $698 for a couple. The company's 29 year old Chief Technology Officer, Balaji Srinivasan, is quoted in the New York Times as saying, "The goal is not to maximize revenue but to bring the benefits to humanity," he said. "Nothing is more relevant than making sure your child doesn't die from a preventable disease."

The test, which the company publicized heavily last week when "Extraordinary Measures" was released, has been offered mainly by fertility clinics, who use genetic testing to screen embryos before implanting them during in-vitro fertilization (IVF). Embryos which test positive for a genetic disease would not be implanted.

But the test is also available directly to consumers over the Internet. The proposed advantages of this is that individuals could get information about whether they carry DNA which would increase their risk of having a child with a genetic disease. The test is limited to only 100 diseases out of thousands of genetic diseases, however. Also, carrying a marker for a disease does not mean that it would be expressed, or if so, in any significant, noticeable way. Indeed, according to the New York Times, "Counsyl executives say 35 to 40 percent of people tested are carriers for at least one disease in the test. In about 0.6 percent to 0.8 percent of cases, they say, both members of the couple are carriers for the same disease."

Counsyl's at-home test, and other DNA tests like it, gives consumers direct access to their DNA information without providing genetic counseling about what their true risks would be. As a result, some people may decide not to have children at all, or may choose to go through IVF so that only "healthy" embryos are implanted. That sounds dangerously close to eugenics.

It's not even clear how accurate the test is. According to the New York Times article, Counsyl has not published any scientific papers about its results, and the test has not been scientifically validated by external reviewers. The FDA does not generally regulate home-based DNA testing.

While a innovative idea, Counsyl's test brings up many ethical issues. It may also be a false promise to those who think they will be guaranteed a healthy baby after getting back normal results. By providing consumers data without context or counseling, this may be a case of giving people more information than they know what to do with. Or as Albert Einstein said, "A little knowledge is a dangerous thing. So is a lot."

Have I Turned Into A Stage Mother?

2010-01-29T21:08:45Z

By Linda Shiue

I'd never imagine myself as a stage mother. An introvert myself, I understood in my soul the terror my similarly introverted daughter must have felt as she walked into the performance space for the first time. While she had spent weeks practicing both her music and her confident bow, all of that preparation melted away as soon as we set foot into the church that was to hold her first ever piano recital. She wouldn't budge, and began clinging to me. I wasn't all that surprised. I had actually been surprised at how confident she had been in the weeks before the recital, but she had started mentioned her fears in the few days prior. Her piano teacher, who had known her since her first lesson six months earlier, also knew about her shyness. She came over cheerfully to greet us, then said, fairly immediately, "You don't have to play today, if you don't want to."

I smiled and gave my appreciation for her understanding, but felt defeated inside. I knew that given this entre, my daughter would not perform, despite her love of playing piano, and all of the weeks she had spent practicing and looking forward to this performance. Who wouldn't take the chance to cop out?

My daughter was listed second on the program. I told the teacher, maybe later? So we agreed that my daughter might perform as the last one before the intermission. No go. In the brief intermission, I cajoled her, offering to sit with her, offering to not sit with her. I began to unload a list of bribes, including the chance to wear nail polish, which she knew I didn't think belonged on the nails of little girls. I talked about the fact that her aunt and uncle had flown all the way from the opposite coast to hear her play, and had brought her her first ever "real jewelry" to wear as a good luck charm. That wasn't enough. I checked in with her after each performer played to see if she felt ready to play. No.

Then I remembered a principle of parenting young children, which is that offering them infinite choices is overwhelming, and not actually something they want. Children feel happier and more comfortable given a decision between two concrete choices. So I tried that: "Do you want to go after Max, or at the end of the whole recital?" Without any hesitation, she said "I want to go last."

So she did get up, to everyone's surprise, including her father, sitting next to her. She didn't take off her coat (despite the beautiful "gown" and "high heels" she had wanted just for this performance). She didn't bow quite as nicely as she has rehearsed over and over at home. She didn't make eye contact with her audience. But she played confidently, and to her mother's ears, as flawlessly and beautifully as could be.

At bedtime, I congratulated her again on overcoming her fear, and for her wonderful first recital. She said, "Mama, do you know, I was so afraid, I felt like if someone was going to kill me."

"Kill you? Why..."

"No, I knew nobody was going to hurt me, but that's how afraid I was, and my heart was going boom-boom-boom."

"I'm sorry, sweetie. I didn't want to force you, but I knew you could do it, and you would be disappointed after all of your hard work if you left without playing."

"Yes, Mama, and that is why you are the best Mama in the world. You are always looking out for me."

She cuddled with me, and I felt relieved that I had made the right decision, in persuading her to perform despite her fear. I didn't want to force her, but I knew that if she didn't perform this time, she would have the same anxiety at the next recital in four months.

But did I push too hard? Have I turned into a stage mother? I was horrified at the degree of terror my daughter reported feeling. (Although she is prone to hyperbole.) Was this overparenting, or old-fashioned parental encouragement to excel? It had been my daughter's choice to take piano lessons. I had specifically chosen a teacher whose reputation was excellent, and who was known for being encouraging, rather than fostering competitiveness. Even so, regular recitals are a normal part of musical training. That's why I made the effort to help my daughter get over her fear of performing. But should I have just let her watch the other students perform, and not insisted that she do so? Despite considering myself a modern parent, I sometimes feel that kids are given too many choices these days. Sometimes, as adults, we have to do things because we need to, even if we really don't want to. If we don't teach our kids that lesson, can they learn it on their own, when the decisions are more significant?

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A version of this essay was published in The New York Times 1/29/2010.

Raising Girls

2010-01-06T06:39:27Z

By Linda Shiue

A recent conversation I had with a friend led me to reflect on how I am raising my two young daughters. I am someone you might expect to be rigidly and consciously raising my daughters in a nonsexist way: I am a feminist, working in medicine, a traditionally male-dominated field. I consider myself low maintenance in my grooming and appearance, both by choice and by convenience (there are a million other things I'd rather do with the time it would take to put on makeup of blowdry my hair, starting with sleeping). But I am also a girly girl sometimes, and my favorite colors include fuschia and purple. I wear pants a lot of the time, but I also love to wear dresses. I admit that I like chivalry sometimes. As a result, while I am thoughtful about the messages I show my girls regarding gender roles, I am not dogmatic. My girls love to wear pink, and dresses, and I don't stop them from wearing those. I don't stop their dad from wearing pink and purple, either.

When I was growing up, there really was not much in the way of commercialism, and certainly very little of it was available to me. With an older brother I shadowed, I essentially grew up playing with whatever he did. That means I built forts, played with those little green army figures, rode bikes, collected rocks, and sometimes tadpoles.

But I did it wearing dresses almost all the time. My parents, both scientists, were frugal, and that was part of the reason I never owned many dolls. I played with my brother's hand me downs. The one time a year my parents would splurge on things would be over the holidays, when there was a fantastic array of science related kits and toys for sale at their research institute. I drooled over the chemistry sets, spy kits, and fiberoptic flashlights we received. I also hung out with both of my parents from time to time in their laboratories.

I was, from the beginning, a serious child and curious student, and as a result, rarely got in trouble at school. But one time, around 3rd grade, I was in serious trouble. My father had brought home something interesting from work to let us have for a few days, and I had brought it to school. I thought everyone at school would be really interested in this treasure as well, but the cafeteria aides did not agree. I guess the little glass jar of rat brains (plural), floating in formaldehyde, were not quite appropriate for me to be showing off at lunch. Not very girly, either.

I am certain that my parents were not explicitly trying to raise me in a non-sexist, feminist way (they would not have even understood those terms, as recent immigrants). As recent arrivals, they knew the path to a better life was through education. They made it clear that there would be no limit to the educational opportunities open to me and my brother, and no differentiation between us. The sky was the limit, limited only by our ambition. I never wanted to be the first girl or woman to do anything; I just wanted to be the first and the best.

How I was raised (as a gender-neutral scientist) may explain my approach to raising my girls. I am conscious about not creating rigid gender roles for them, and in a relaxed way am trying to keep their world as gender neutral as possible. When I was able to spend the most time with them, in their infancy and toddlerhoods, I introduced them to books, music, nature and science, as opposed to ballet and gymnastics. It is normal to them that doctors can be female, since their mom is. They see me cook and bake, because that is my obsession. But they have also seen me use a drill and a hammer, and they have observed me managing the all-male team who worked on our house. Through my example, I hope my daughters are growing up unaware that many people believe that some jobs are for men, and others for women, either in or outside the home. We are lucky to be raising them in Northern California, where most people we know are like-minded.

The one arena in which I am unbending is regarding dolls. My daughters have babydolls, which are completely genderless (in fact, their dolls have never had proper names, but instead somewhat bland names such as "yellow baby" and "pink baby"). But I won't let them buy a Barbie, or a Bratz doll, and have gone so far as to give away those dolls when well-meaning friends or colleagues have given them as gifts. Having these dolls just doesn't make any sense to me, since they don't resemble any normal type of human, and I have no interest in promoting an unrealistic body image.

How has this played out? I don't know what this indicates, but my older daughter, having gone through a Princess phase, now has a penchant for reading dry biographies. My little one wants to be a pirate when she grows up. But we know that none of us can isolate our kids from outside influences. While I restrict their television watching as much as possible, you wouldn't know it from what they have learned from other kids at school. Sure enough, from preschool age, I have heard my daughters talk about "boy things" and "girl things."

And so, I interrogated:

"What are 'boy things'?" I asked my second grader.

"Boy things are things like Star Wars, superheroes." she said, in the tone of, don't you know anything? "Why did you like that stuff when you were little, Mama? Did you like Transformers? Did you watch Spiderman?"

"Well, I did that because I did everything your uncle did."

She thought for a minute. "I like boy things! I like Pokemon and Star Wars."

"Why do you like those?"

"Because they're fun, they're cute."

"Why are they boy things?"

"Because a lot of boys like them." (Makes sense.)

"Can girls play with them?"

"Yes!"

"What are girl things?"

"Strawberry Shortcake, Princess things, Wizard of Oz and Charlie Brown ."

"Are there girl colors and boy colors?"

"Boys like dark blue and green, like me, and girls like pink and purple and violet and yellow and red," she answered confidently.

"Why do you like dark blue and green?"

"They are pretty to me." (Again in the tone of, why are you asking the obvious?)

True words, from the mouths of babes. So it seems that what my kids have figured out so far is that there may be "boy" and "girl" labels on colors, toys, and activities, but-- and this distinction is crucial-- both boys and girls can like any of these, if they want to.

So far, so good.

When Is A Kid Old Enough to Call Friends on the Phone?

2009-12-11T08:21:04Z

Image via Wikipedia

By Linda Shiue

A few weeks into the Kindergarten year, my daughter's teacher went over her "assessment" test and pointed out that she had lost points for not knowing her phone number, mailing address, and zip code. (If I had known she was supposed to know those as part of her score, I would have taught her!) I quickly understood that knowing at least the first two bits of information is important for safety. Example: this picture of my husband, circa 1972, calling on an old fashioned rotary phone. According to family legend, he is calling the police to report his parents for not watching him closely enough, and that's how he fell (see bloody band-aid on his forehead). And I now make sure my kids know our home number, my cell number, and 911.

But what about calling just to say hi, teenage style? Since starting second grade my otherwise reticent daughter has been eager to call one friend of hers at night, after school. I was caught by surprise by this request, since I was not accustomed to calling friends just to chat until maybe 6th or even 7th grade. Tonight, as a special treat, I allowed her to call her friend, whom I will refer to as Ann, not her real name, under my supervision, after she had done her homework, practiced piano, etc. The conversation was remarkably tween/teen-like:

Daughter: Hi, Ann! What are you doing?

Ann: Nothing.

Daughter: Have you had dinner yet?

Ann: Not yet.

Daughter: What is your mom making? Ooh- you got Chinese takeout from Stonestown? Panda? Yum!

Ann: <>

Daughter: What are you wearing tomorrow?

And so on.

At what age do you think it is appropriate for kids to chat on the phone like this? When do they "need" cell phones?

Sibling Rivalry

2009-12-03T05:36:54Z

Image via Wikipedia

By Linda Shiue

The days are getting shorter, and by the time I make the 45 minute drive from work to my daughters' school to pick them up, it is very dark and I am very tired. I actually tripped on the last step at their school and sprained my ankle tonight, just yards from returning to the car.

After hobbling to the car, the last thing I wanted to hear was the usual backseat squabbling and competition for my attention. The simultaneous shouting is incomprehensible, cacophonous, and usually escalates to actual fighting. It sounds something like "Mama! MA! MA! alijt059DHY69374=0-0987@#465! Screech!" I was not at all in the mood to hear that tonight.

"Please be good, kids." I said. "Mama is in a lot of pain. Here are some M&M's." (Remainders from the confiscated Halloween candy from last month. And yes, I do realize I violated a basic parenting rule against bribery.)

And... it worked!

So instead of the screaming cacophony, I heard two distinct voices and a dialogue tonight:

7 yo: "You know what? It seems like the big brother or sister, the big sibling, is usually the meanie."

Mama: "What do you mean?"

5 yo Yeah! Like you (referring to her sister)!"

7 yo "Mm-hm."

Mama: "Why do you say that?"

7 yo: "Well, because before the younger sibling is born, the older one is used to being the most important one in the world, but after the younger one is born, the older one doesn't get any attention."

Ouch.

So despite my throbbing, swollen ankle, fatigue from a long day, and the insistent, constant and forte competition for attention from my younger daughter, I held my older girl on my lap tonight for her piano practice. This little extra bit of attention really worked. I'll have to remember this the next time I wonder why the 7 year old is pinching her baby sister.